I turned our pictures face side down
And stopped playing the songs you sent me
Removed my favorite necklace
With your smiling face etched into the locket
From its home around my neck
Breathed a new scent that I had begun to forget
And others seemed to miss

I placed it inside my jewelry box
Where it clanked against my gold hoops
And amber rings from my godmother
A world traveller, the first in so many ways —
Long gone

I placed the precious jewel on my middle finger
Held my hand out and studied
The gem for so long
Until my vision blurred
With tears 

And I placed my shrine to you 
In the top corner of the ceiling in my bedroom
So I could find my hands again
Force these knuckles out of their prayer-bent shape
Touching them to this lump of clay rotting in the center of my chest
And shaping it into
The woman I came here to be  

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